You had to be there.
Just you, wearing your American flag shirt, hanging out of your window, trying to sell me your muscle car wedged on the sidewalk between your house and a fire hydrant.
It was such sweet serendipity that you had to be there standing at the bus stop, dressed in pink from head to toe—the fashion icon that you are.
I had to be there while you were watering your lawn.
Our eyes locked.
Mine through the camera's viewfinder, yours squinting against the light as you sunbathed in those incredibly skimpy man-drawers.
We made such beautiful art.
I'm sorry you missed out, you had to be there.
Christ died for you, so you could live.
But also: fuck you you fuckin' fuck.
It's hard to imagine, but picture this:
Spidey pulled a pistol, and a clown appeared.
There were animal prints, polka dots and SPAM.
But, you know what they say...
You had to be there, and I'm so glad you're here.
You Had to Be There, the photography book, was released on September 5th, 2025.